Red, White and The Blues

Dear Miss Kitty,
My long term girl friend and I have come to the place where, although we still care for each other, we are feeling perhaps we have taken this relationship as far as it can go. It’s got to be one of the hardest decisions I have made in a long time because I am not so sure that I might not find that later on in life, I made a bad choice and should have worked through the discontent. We have both looked at this for a while and it isn’t getting any clearer. We would both welcome any clarity you can provide with open arms.
William, Santa Barbara



Dear William,
No one playing the dirty game of politics is immune to the daily tabloid’s sleazy tall tales designed to “inform” their readers of the important shortcomings of candidates for public office. Accolades, experience and commendations aside, it tends to be the negative (real or imagined) that drives our political choices. As usual, the fear factor is recklessly driving our thoughts – and therefore our reality - over the speed limit for negativity, right past what we want into what we do not want. Is it any different when faced with the vexing challenge of whether to impeach a relationship or not? Could we be content with “most excellent” relationship poll results and still want something more? Can someone “work” for us and yet not be “The One” - and therefore be worth risking who-knows-what? When it comes to choosing Presidents or life partners, there is always more choice on the line than one could ever imagine. And the results of those choices, like an iceberg’s true depth, are hiding deep and unseen within the murky future.

Regardless of the way the wind is blowing the flag, there is the good, the bad and the ugly contained in all relationships. There is no one that is perfectly in tune with their main constituent and had a 100% approval rating at all times. A good choice for an effective relationship statesperson is someone that operates with congruence. The die-hard basic principal of clean living and high standards in all things goes a long way toward effective leadership. Everyone wants to be on the ticket with a thoughtful person who lives on high moral ground. The big difference between voting for daily safety and daily hotness is where “in love” and “love” show their true colors.

Like the perfect government, both benevolent compassion and flag-waving patriotic pride need to be in play for a relationship to work on a global scale. People, like politicians, are not fully interchangeable, regardless of their male or female status, or experience in foreign affairs. In other words, whatever isn’t working now has the potential - but won’t necessarily - show up in the next relationship. As a result, we should be very cautious of what we wish for when we say we want “Change”.

That being noted, wondrous well articulated campaign speeches only go so far as any man or woman that has been taxed by a smooth and slick sweet-talker can tell you. What happened in the past is only as good as the lessons that have been learned and implemented today. As far as experience goes, it’s what you do with it in the now that counts, not what you say you will do. It is frightening to make a decision when the future is unclear, but as that great states-alien Yoda would say, “Decide you will.”

If any choice made between partners invokes feelings of loss of what could have been, jubilation about potential, and clarity about the important next steps, one comes to the strange but true realization that there is no wrong choice. Just temporary thoughts, feelings and actions that will lead into a future that no one can predict.

Darling William, and Boys and Girls, we are not the sum of all that is. Egos set well aside, relationship choices - like votes - become clear when we make them for the good of something better than we could ever imagine or believe possible. Not from the place of what isn’t happening, is negative, or is bad for us. Not out of fear of loss that we are making a mistake that can’t ever be corrected if need be. So are our choices one-way mirrors looking right at us? As sure as Miss Kitty is a write-in Presidential candidate on your ballot come November! It comes down to uplifting our relationships, and our politics, up to where they belong: into the land of the truly free and not the home of the slave.

By the way, if you want a “Vote for Miss Kitty! Uplift America - one bra at a time” bumper sticker, pop by Purrmission Lingerie and pick one up while supplies last. Look out, McBama – Miss Kitty is hitting the campaign trail to educate America on her Uplifting Bra Experience platform! (Thanks Rocketman for the edit of a lifetime!)

Have a naughty day!