Wedding Grapes and Raisin's to Consider

Dear Miss Kitty,
I am getting married in a few weeks and there is a lot on my mind. Besides all the usual wedding details, I am thinking about all the changes that we have been discussing and what more is too come. At what point should we just give it a rest and let what will be….be?
Love,
Something old, something new, something borrowed and need help from you!!!!


Dear Something,
The venerable grape, the esteemed and sacred fruit. “Peel me a grape” conjures up glorious renaissance canvases bedecked with naked nymphs and serious sirens, tempting their wiles; decadence abounding among the hanging bunches. The glorious little morsel is a master of versatility. Hot and sweaty in the dirty hands of a toddler, each little juicy promise waiting to be popped into cupid like lips. Or provider of the naked juice, honed into noble nectar, the toast of many a festive gathering or intimate moment for two.

The versatile grape has another, much different form - the humble and ripened raisin. Devoid of the great publicity it’s younger, juicier form has enjoyed, the simple but sweet morsel is the picked upon alter ego, the shy little sister, that can blossom forth and add zest when given half a chance.

Rarely do you hear someone rhapsodize over a profusion of raisins in a cookie. More than likely, the cookie-maker just couldn’t find any chocolate chips! Are some relationships like raisins, something that you have to really work at to include on the menu?

Like the grape’s time-worn and sunburned cousin, can our relationships become important only at certain times and in certain dishes, and overlooked and under appreciated the rest of the year? Are our partners like raisins - something we value only because it doesn’t spoil easily, isn’t sour, and is easy to pack away and eat when there’s nothing more exciting available?

“Raisin Times”, isn’t a retirement home for old Thompson seedless or a gourmet newspaper for toddlers - it is the time when a relationship matures into the analytical and tangible aspects of living life with another human being. It is when housing, the stuff, children, and all the ways of life are re-defined, planned, agreed upon and take new directions in order for the relationship, and both people in it, to evolve and grow into a new, improved whole.

We know that there will come a time when we choose to leave some of the comforts and freedom of being a solo act, in order to attain a higher bond with another. This chosen change brings about more than just joy and interest in the future. It naturally brings about many questions and aspects of both the known and unknown. There are concrete conclusions to be found along with ethereal and unfound, as yet possibilities.

Great potential or rich reward is never without more than a glimmer of trepidation, and planning is always part of the process. The mindful, gather information like fruit and spread it out for all to review. The best fruit is kept and the squishy ones, thrown away. There may be some feelings left for the squishy and not so perfect, the bruised but still good one side, but over all, letting some things go, for the good of the harvest as a whole, does not come about on it’s own. If the relationship has a capable and willing team of gardeners, that have planted carefully, they will reap the best harvest possible and if there is more work to do, they can always go back to the basics and start over again. There is always a season for planting something good.

Darling Boys and Girls, what grapes and raisins have in common is more than what they have as differences, since they both grow in bunches and you can’t buy a single raisin or a grape! It is what we have in common, that keeps us together, and therefore is always more important than our differences.

Have a naughty day!